Negotiation Journal

It was interesting to attend the 1st Negotiation session. As you have indicated this is a reflection of my thoughts hence please pardon the informality of the language. As shared I am currently involved in mediating a particularly tricky negotiation between two parties that has broken down. Both parties have over the months proposed, counter-proposed and renegaded on countless positions. I have had the experience of observing both sides negotiating styles. Both sides are uncompromising and set very high expectations. Both actually are aiming for a win-lose position where they and the other party lose. As you can imagine these present great difficulties for the mediator.

During the class I had the insight that the main problem with the negotiation is not about the issues itself but it was the other emotional baggage that came with it. It was a clash of personalities between the key players on both parties. It does not matter what concessions were given, the two sides were never going to agree. Both had too much “face” involved in the negotiation to back down.

That’s where I come in. I represent the neutral party that has to resolve the situation for the sake of national interest. In a particularly depressing debrief after another round of negotiation that led nowhere, my boss made an interesting comment. He basically said if both sides cannot back down because the emotional stakes were too high, perhaps we could step in to negotiate a solution separately with each of the parties. We had leverage on both parties as they needed something from both of us. It could work as both parties now had a line of retreat where they could still stick to their positions and don’t come across as “losing” to each other. They could adopt the position they were giving “face” to my organisation hence agree to our solution. It was worth a try. I was reflecting that perhaps with some skills that I could pick up in the next 5 lessons I use it to “negotiate”