I Believe People Should Live a Happy and Peaceful Life

I was a young black woman, married with two wonderful kids; a boy and girl, I had a brand new car, I had a great paying job and was working on purchasing a new house. I had pretty much what many women wanted, but something just wasn’t right. I battled with myself for years. Then one night, when I was home alone lying down in my bed, thinking, I started crying like a little baby. I cried for almost an hour. I realized my life was a lie; I was unhappy and felt I was fighting a war I was losing.

I was married to a man that didn’t love me. He only loved what I was able to provide for him. He cheated on me, physical and emotional abused me, when he was able too. I sat there and asked myself why I would stay in something that made me so miserable. I began to wonder what to do. It occurred to me, that I might have gotten myself too tightly wrapped up in this marriage and have lost myself. I remembered what my grandmother once told me “Stephanie, don’t let a man take away your happiness”

In that moment, I realized that my marriage was over. Well, according to me it was. Now, all I had to do was break it to my husband. Of course, it was difficult. We were both hurting. I hated letting him down, but I could not live a lie. So, I mustered up the courage to end the marriage that appeared perfect to the outside world. I knew I had to change things so that same night when my husband came home, I told him, I wanted out of this marriage and informed him he had to leave tonight. He left and I went to bed. The next morning, immediately, I felt calmer and more myself. I felt alive, I felt happy and I felt at peace. That was the day I realized, the only way I wanted to live, was to have a happy and peaceful life. That day was a new beginning and I vowed to live my life according to my belief.

I started to make a list of all the things in my life that wasn’t making me happy and slowly cutting them out my life. That same year, I quit my job and moved