The Impact of Divorce on Children

The Impact of Divorce on Children

Yuliya Yeryemyeyeva

Liberty University

Abstract

Strong, supportive families raise physically and mentally healthy children. Every year a large numbers of children of different age groups are affected by divorce or legal separation. This article explains how divorce may impact mental wellbeing of children and an impact family separation has on children younger than 18 years of age. Being separated from one of the parents may cause significant psychological childhood trauma. Some of the effects that children experience post-divorce are depression, anger spells, behavioral and socialization issues. Parental involvement after divorce is very important in child`s life and helps a child to deal with emotional crisis after family separation occurs.  Parental classes before final marital dissolution court hearing are mandated in some states and prove to be effective in educating divorcing parents about importance of time sharing and involvement of both parents in child`s life after divorce. Research shows that educating both parents result in better compliance with time sharing and better understanding of psychological impact divorce may have on children.

        Keywords: divorce effects, emotional response to divorce, long term divorce consequences, behavior and divorce in children, shared custody, time sharing, parental classes

The Impact of Divorce on Children

From the first moment after a child is born into this world, he is in need of nurturing, care and love. When all needs are met the child feels safe and secure. He grows to be healthy mentally and physically and able to effectively deal with difficult situations in life and resolve crisis.  Both parents play significant role in helping a child to become physically strong and mentally stable as an adult.  Each parent brings unique aspects and contributions to parenting. Each uniquely impacts the life of a child in the family unit. Family is a strong social micro organization and plays fundamental role in every child`s life.  When family foundation is unstable throughout childhood the challenges may arise in child`s life which, in turn, can lead to psychological dysfunctions and pathology. Both parents exemplify a role model in their child`s world. The internal parental diversity brings richer experiences and contrast in interaction between the child and each parent.  Family is a first and primary source of love and affection, traditions and values, limits and appropriate social behavior. A strong family can be viewed as child`s own small world that will strongly influence his future and lifestyle.  

Every day a large number of children face divorce and legal parental separation.  According to Walker (2000), “Couples marrying today have about a 50% chance of getting a divorce over their lifetime” (p.13). He states, “Overall, only 68% of all children under the age of 18 live in the traditional two parent nuclear family. White children more often live with two parents (75%) than Hispanic (62%) or Black (33%) children” (Walker, 2000, p. 13). According to Guttmann (1993), “Divorce was for decades perceived not only as an indication of pathology in divorcing individuals, but also as a social disease” (p.2). Most of the time divorcing people considers themselves or their partners as responsible for marital breakdown therefore guilt and shame are the prevailing emotions during the time of dissolution (Guttmann, 1993).  The fact that one of the parents unable to be full time in child`s life brings tremendous amount of stress, anger, negative experience and instability in their lives. At the time when parents separate or divorced process is initiated the disturbances in child`s behavior may not be obvious immediately and only with time the consequences become more pronounced.  However, the first emotional reactions often have been seen in children facing divorce are anger, confusion and sadness (Brotherson, 2012). There are studies that examined parental separation on behavior in midchildhood, adolescence and adulthood. The effect have been shown to be most adverse for younger children, presumably because younger children are more dependent on their parents, have less extra-familial support structures, and are in a more formative stage of development (Brotherson, 2012). Parental absence may also cause lower secure parent–child attachment, and less parental monitoring, in turn leading to child problem behavior (Averdijk, 2012). The results of different studies showed that effects may be stronger in boys than in girls in the form of anxiety and depression (Averdijk, 2012). The effects of separation may not be due to the separation event itself, but due to the parental conflict before and during separation (Averdijk, 2012). Prior research has documented that depression is associated with parental separation, although it may be short lived (Averdijk, 2012). According to Averdijk (2012), the maternal depression post-divorce as well as low self-esteem may affect the quality of the parent–child relationship and the well-being of the child, potentially leading to child`s problematic behavior. Parental conflict and financial difficulties post and during divorce process also play significant role in child`s behavior and regulation of emotions (Averdijk, 2012). The economic deprivations post-divorce and the importance of family income greatly effect children’s well-being. Both children’s personal economic distress and the family’s financial situation have been shown to be related to lower emotional stability among children (Robbers, 2012). Research has shown that single fathers are better off than single mothers not only when it comes to income and employment, but also outside support (Bastaits, 2012). Therefore, families where mother is a single parent will have more financial and emotional difficulties and stress than those where father is (Bastaits, 2012). Previous research showed that children in single-father families do not show a higher risk of emotional health problems. Current research has shown, however, that although children in single-father families do not report an increased risk of internalizing behavior, they have an increased risk of externalizing behaviors like substance abuse (Robbers, 2012). According to Turunen (2013), “There is a clear negative age gradient for girls in the models for psychosomatic well-being, whereas no such pattern can be seen for boys” (p.499). Taking the patterns for both the psychological as well as the psychosomatic outcomes together it may be conclusive that boys and girls might be affected differently by living in different family settings (Turunen, 2013).