The Day That Changed My Life

Erica Champion

Professor Callahan

ENG 111

29 May 2019

February 23, 2016

        I opened my eyes to the same monotonous train choo chooing that annoyed me out of my sleep. I laid as flat as possible in bed, I was in nauseating pain. When I gathered enough courage to muscle the pain, I got up and searched desperately for the bottle of 80 milligram oxycodone I hid somewhere under my pillow. I pulled out 6 pills: two for the morning, one for lunch, and three before the game. I shook my head at the amount of money I was about to ingest, 80 dollars a pill. I immediately crushed the pills on my AP Biology textbook and began to draw up even thin lines with a business card I took from my dad’s wallet. It was an average morning. It was a professional dress day I reminded myself in disgust. I must choose which dress will make me the least uncomfortable throughout the day. Sleep still crusted in the corners of my eyes, and a yawn stuck in the back of my throat I climbed in my 2014 GMC Terrain. My phone automatically connected to my car radio, and I began to play my morning playlist. While flying down 29, my mind wasn’t focused on the road. I was stuck on the feeling of butterflies in my chest. Tonight was our last home game of the season, my team and I were scheduled to play our rival school, Wakefield. I felt a lump of anxiety rise from my chest to the top of my throat upon realization that I still had to design posters and create puff paint shirts in celebration of Soha. After all she was our only senior, and it was senior night. My head was crowded with so many thoughts, it had never occurred to me that today would be the last day I would have to look my coach, trainer, and abuser in the eyes. I spent the first half of my day consumed with anxiety about trivial things, oblivious to the fact that my life would change forever in a matter of hours.  The thought never occurred in my mind that today was the day that I would have to begin the fight for my life.

        My morning schedule was the same as always. There was a scheduled assembly right after advisory. I didn’t go, because that meant all the hallway would be empty, and the freshman restrooms would be available. I spent the hour-long assembly in the restrooms getting high, ensuring I wouldn’t withdraw throughout the day. I chewed on 2 oxycodone 80mg pills. I took a couple milligrams of Xanax hoping my anxiety would decrease. Fearing that the Xanax would cause me to doze off throughout the rest of the school day, I finished my concoction of opioids and benzodiazepines with 3 lines of cocaine. I had to perform in our game tonight, or I would have grueling consequences. After satisfying the beast in me, I spent the rest of the morning hiding in the photography dark room. I was sleeping off the initial wave of the drugs.

I woke up to the lunch bell ringing, as I stood up and felt human again. My mental and physical pain was at a low buzz in my body, annoying but tolerable. I got up stretched and checked my phone. I read a text from Coach Logan saying “Make sure you get ur mind right for 2night. U have to show out.” I rolled my eyes remembering my agreement about tonight’s game, and I replied, “Ur the boss.” I exited the dark room and walked up the staircase to the ceramics room. I began to lay out 12 black t shirts and 6 white poster boards. The team agreed to meet at lunch, so we all could ensure we had our decorations complete to hang up prior to the game. After lunch was halfway over none of my teammates had shown to help, so I began to panic. I knew at that point I was on my own. I decided to skip my long period. It was a few minutes into the first period following lunch, and Mr. Leake came and got me from the ceramics room. He told me that we needed to talk as we walked through the empty hallway from the art wing to his office. Halfway to his office he asked me where my phone was, and I told him it was still plugged into the wall in the ceramics room. We walked back and I grabbed it, and he preceded to take it out of my hand and hold it. This made me feel uneasy, it was very odd. A very large red flag rose in my head, and the panic started to grow in my chest.