The Reality of Co-Parenting

Ryan Quinonez

Mr. Pearson

Composition I

November 15, 2010

The Reality of Co-Parenting

Riveting and brutally honest, the two articles “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It was.” by Hope Edelman and “My Problem with Her Anger” by Eric Bartels portray through first hand experiences the challenges that come with co-parenting. With Edelman's article coming from the perspective of an angry wife and Bartels' from a distressed husband, they explain the difficulties of stepping out of the gender roles by attempting equal parenting, and the stress, anger, and responsibilities carried by each spouse.

In “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It was.” Hope Edelman is the mother of one and a wife of an extremely busy husband. After being married for only two years and already a mother and homeowner, she had quickly came to the reality of parenting and wasn't happy with it. Making the sacrifice of cutting back on work to take care of the slack around the house and doing the majority of raising their daughter bothered her a great deal. She did not like having all the responsibilities on her and the stress became overwhelming. Once she realized her and her husband were not achieving their goals of co-parenting she became enraged feeling as if she had entered into this marriage deceived and in the end left sad. As a child her mother passed away and her father, who had little part in her childhood, was left in charge clueless on parenting. Feeling distant from her father as a child, as if she didn't know who he really was, lead her to the goal of co-parenting so that her children would never experience the same thing. Taking a tole on the time spent with kids and even romance, her husbands work hours seemed to continuously rise. Edelman was jetting with irrational anger, blaming various things, but mainly her husband for not letting her know what she was truly getting into. Trying a therapy session helped them understand each other but their arguing continued to deteriorate their marriage. She even got to the point of spite-full spending for a short lived indulging thrill, but nothing could replace the need of her husband being there for her. Over time she got over the idea of co-parenting and an equilibrium was found. With day care, babysitters, and decreased work hours for her husband, everything worked their ways out. Making it through the hardest years of parenting Hope Edelman and her husband sorted out their troubles and continue on happily with their marriage.

Much like the Edelman family, Eric Bartels is going through the same problems only through his story “My Problem with Her Anger” he shows what is it like from