Modernized Romeo and Juliet Script

Modernized Romeo and Juliet Script: Act 1 Scene 1

Holly: Abram, Lord Montague

Reilly: Gregory, Officer

Lisa: Sampson, Romeo, Lady Capulet

Brooke: Lady Montague, Prince, Tybalt

Maya: Benvolio, Lord Capulet

Sampson: Gregory, there’s no way we will take crap from no one.

Gregory: Yeah because then we would be pushovers.

Sampson: And if they get us mad then we’ll fight back.

Gregory: Well old chap, while you’re still alive don’t hide your head in your collar man. Fight!

Sampson: Yeah because when they piss me off I get violent.

Gregory: But nothing ever pisses you off.

Sampson: Montagues piss me off.

Gregory: Yeah only because you have to run away from them. If you get pissed off from something like that then you’re a coward.

Sampson: But in order to stand I would have to move thus allowing me to fight. And I move towards the wall, forcing my enemies to walk the streets.

Gregory: But that means you’re weak because it is the weaklings that get backed into walls.

Sampson: Yes but that also means that women get pushed into walls. Therefore I will force Montagues to the street and their woman to the walls.

Gregory: The fight is between us men.

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Sampson: It doesn’t matter. After I’ve fought the men I’ll be gentle with the women by

cutting off their heads.

Gregory: You mean their maiden heads

Sampson: Whatever, cut off their heads, steal their maidenheads. Take it anyway you want.

Gregory: Yeah well it’s the women who’ll have to feel it.

Sampson: And they will feel it for as long as I am hard. Everyone knows I’m a nice piece of flesh.

Gregory: It’s good you’re flesh and not fish, cause you’re dry and wrinkly like a fish. Take out your weapons, here come those scumbag Montagues.

(Enter Abram)

Sampson: My sword is out, you fight and I’ll be backup.